Tuesday, January 24, 2006

What is this FEAR preventing..................

25/01/2006 / 12:25

yesterday morning something VERY interesting happened in the Dining hall, involving one fearful Irani brother, calling …. to protect him against me!! What is this FEAR preventing people from loving……… And this man said something VERY stupid, trying to intimidate me, that I had to write a long letter to our chairman telling the story to find out what is happening here: is he a ‘Babalover’ or ‘devil-liker’! It is very complicated issue and it cannot be said here, except when necessary and with all details. So I went to the Trust office at 4:10 and rested in Maharaj’s room for sometime and then we had a very very emotional and constructive meeting…. On the way back with our ‘Universal Queen’, she told me how this place is so effective for dealing with our sanskaras and how one day of living here can be equal to years of ‘intense meditation’ and other ‘spiritual work’! Yes, I can see this in me and others, BUT, it seems that for a very few minority, the ‘amount/quality’ of their sanskaras are so THICK, that even years of being here has not freed them from the basic obstacles: fear, hatred, selfishness, etc…. well, that is their work any way and I better do MY work! Despite all the high-rising emotional tides, before and during the meeting, Bhauji’s loving care and wisdom made it a very useful and constructive event in my life. The amount of care and love I receive from my dear sisters and brothers here is SO MUCH that the fear and hatred of a few ‘poor souls’ around, doen NOT bother me a bit, even though it makes me weep deeply sometimes, as it happened in that meeting, and even BEFORE it, in a place I had lunch yesterday. The next-table Indian brother seeing me crying in silence, came over and offered his ‘help’ and when I showed Bab’s picture and told him that ‘Baba is helping’, he left me alone! And I see these tears as actually ‘therapeutic’, sorry for those whose tear glands are dried up and have to suppress all the beautiful emotions and look ‘tough’!

this morning had a letter from an American brother, sending me 3 of our photos in the trip to Ellora Caves, will post 1 or 2 here……… Jay Baba……………


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