latest emotional developments! آخرین رویدادهای عاطفی

‏10:49 / ‏07/01/2006

سلام/ صبح شنبه است و آفتابی و آرام. دیشب در سالن نهارخوری با خواهر صحبت کردم که ایشان بازهم موضوع "اطاعت" را پیش کشید ک مجبور شدم ه بازهم برداشت خود را بگویم که منظور بابا از "اطاعتی که بالاتر از عشق است" اطاعت از حقیقت و خداوند است و نه از بندگان جایزالخطای خداوند!. ایشان اعلام کرد که "شغل" ایشان است که اشیای بجای مانده از زایرین را تحویل اداره اموال گمشده بدهند. و من هم دقیقاٌ برای همین است که مزاحم ایشان می شوم و آن طبل را از ایشان می خواهم. با شواهد و نشانی هایی که من دارم و مسئولیتی که ایشان دارد بهتر است روشن بشود که این طبل الان کجاست و چرا این مدت مخفی شده بوده!

امروز صبح هم که دوباره به نرمی از ایشان سوال کردم که "طبل کجاست؟" ایشان آهسته از من خواست تا به بیرون از محوطه بروم و در آنجا گفت که احساس "مورد اذیت قرار گرفتن" می کند و اگر من ادامه بدهم مجبور است بر خلاف میلش از دست من رسماٌ شکایت کند! عجب؟ خیلی جالب است! یعنی من حق پیگیری هم ندارم؟ یعنی که طبل بال درآورده و ازآشیانه اش در مقبره ی بابا غیب شده است؟ جلوی چشم اینهمه زایر و نگهبان و مسئولان حفظ اموال بابا!!! خلاصه راهی نماند جز اینکه قبل از اینکه ایشان از من شاکی بشود من جریان ماوقع را به آگاهی سایرین مسئولین اینجا برسانم تا همگی بدانیم در اینجا چه میگذرد! بعد ازصبحانه به دفتر رفتم و طی دو صفحه دستنویس، ماجرا را برای "هرکه بهش مربوط است" نوشتم و امضا کردم. تا ببینیم چه نتیجه ای بدهد!

Peace. A wonderful sunny and calm Saturday on the Magic Hill..... Happy Dharma Day!....
Last night at dining hall had a lengthy discussion with the sister and she was sarcastic on me about ‘knowing Baba’! Yes, some ‘senior residents’ here really THINK that since they have been here LONG and I am a ‘new comer’, so ‘naturally’ they ‘know’ Baba more than I do! Well, what to say to this kind of mentality? Thanks to Baba that their number is so little that it is NOT a serious issue! BUT when it comes to ‘dealing with’ and'treating' these ‘new comers’, they can cause problems, like the ones I faced in the first few months and still NOW! The ‘issue’ was about ‘obeying God’ which Baba had said once, in a sequence of priorities, in aspecial CONTEXT that is even ‘higher than love’! So for some ‘sophisticated minds’, they interpret this as such that I should obey the people in charge! Because they are in charge!!!!! What a ‘logic’, na?! And this is the same sister I wrote for her once that ‘please do not quote Baba OUT OF CONTEXT…’! She meant, at that time, few months ago, that I should have obeyed a brother who was angry at me and wanted to kick me out of the tomb, while I was playing Daff! Thanks to Baba that I am NOT an ‘obedient kid’ and showed them that this is NOT Baba’s way!

This morning, after the prayers, when I asked her softly, “where is the drum?”, she asked me to go out to tell me something! (something premeditated of course!). She said that she feels ‘harassed’ by my enquiries and if I continue, she has to file a ‘complaint against’ me, and she does not like to do this! Wow! How wonderful! How ‘tactful’! this means that I shall drop the case and forget about the drum, if I want to live in peace!
Her 'gentle threat' means that ‘relax, DO NOT ASK ME, the drum has flown out of its nest at Baba’s Tomb and has gone for a ride on the clouds!’ VERY interesting approach. Is this the meaning of responsibility?! She has been so ‘responsible’ to ask Kishor to take that drum to the Lost/Found Office, but it was closed on Sunday! So what had happened to the Drum, AFTER Kishor refused to take it on Sunday? SOMEBODY MUST KNOW.
And who better than the responsible ‘lover’ in charge?!
She would not leave the place without knowing what would happen to it.
And the good thing is that all the ‘duties’ are registered in the book and that place is never left without a person in charge!

Anyway, last night she reconfirmed that it is her ‘duty’ to take the personal stuff OUT of the shed….. THIS IS EXACTLY the reason I follow up the case with her.

صبحانه ی خوب در جمعی دوستانه داشتیم و کلی خندیدیم. یکی دیگر از برادران جوان هم ظاهراٌ با مشکلاتی که من داشتم، به نوع خودش رو به رو بوده است و این مایه ی خوشوقتی است!

Had a nice arti and breakfast this morning, Daniel is leaving and we sang The Happy Trails song for him. He sang a nice meaningful song of Baba with guitar…..

یکی از برادران آمریکایی که دیروز باهاش آشنا شدم از من دعوت کرد تا روز چهارشنبه با جمعشان سفری یک روزه به غارهای باستانی و مشهور آجنتا Ajenta Caves در نزدیکی اینجا برویم. با خوشحالی قبول کردم و اگر مشکل خاصی پیش نیاید با آن ها خواهم رفت. در همین یک روزه صمیمیت و محبت خاصی بین ما برقرار شده که قابل توصیف نیست و فقط در بغل کردن های مهرآمیز است که نشان داده می شود و در نگاه ها و لبخندها....

One American brother whom I met yesterday, invited me to join them for a one-day trip to the ancient Ajenta caves nearby, on Wednesday. Gladly accepted since we have felt a great sense of brotherhood, since we met at the Samadhi. His wife Susan is also a ‘light unto herself’ and both are radiating love and compassion. This feeling can not be expressed in words and can only be expressed by compassionate hugs and looks in the eyes and the gentle smiles………. Thanx to Baba